Originally Published in Ginger & Smoke Vol. 1 (An anthology reclaiming Filipino folklore mythology and fairy tales) October 31, 2025 Behind my eyelids, I meditate in colours. A gentle breath in and out; my diaphragm rising and falling with each exchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide. I start to detach my awareness from the overwhelming cacophony of modern life—cars backing up in driveways, trains screeching on metal tracks, the sounds of electricity buzzing in my apartment—an

I used to overthink and not share anything in the pursuit of perfection and self-protection. I became trapped in thought loops and my own patterns of questioning myself before I even tried. So much of my expression is borne out of pain but so much is also borne out of the gratitude I feel for each breath I take. Sharing these feelings is vulnerable and terrifying and I know this is why I have held back for so long. But I cannot keep hiding, I need to share and open parts of

For the last few years, I have been quietly filling the pages of notebooks and documents with hundreds of thousands of words; devouring books on a range of topics with a fervour I had not experienced since childhood and creating thousands of pieces of art for the first time since I was a teenager. But I kept all of it hidden away to gather dust and live in the liminal space between the act of creation and the act of sharing with open-hearted vulnerability. The hiding of